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Apparently this is me.

So, not too long ago at work we were suffering through some “group exercises” to “build teamwork” (thankfully there was no “hugging,” or GOD forbid, “sharing”)–BUT anyway, one of the things we did was take the Myers-Briggs assessment. I’ve never formally taken it before and certainly never done so with a whole bunch of other people. One thing I must say, the statistics provided as to what percentage of the population is usually this four-letter combination and what is usually that four-letter combination turned out to be nearly spot-on in terms of our little gang of twenty or so.

As it turns out, I am an INTP. This is an INTP:

INTPs live in the world of theoretical possibilities. They live primarily inside their own minds, having the ability to analyze difficult problems, identify patterns, and come up with logical explanations. They seek clarity in everything, and are therefore driven to build knowledge. They are the “absent-minded professors”, who highly value intelligence and the ability to apply logic to theories to find solutions.

The INTP has no understanding or value for decisions made on the basis of personal subjectivity or feelings. They strive constantly to achieve logical conclusions to problems, and don’t understand the importance or relevance of applying subjective emotional considerations to decisions. The INTP is usually very independent, unconventional, and original. They are not likely to place much value on traditional goals such as popularity and security.

INTPs are about 1% of the general population, making this one of the rarest of types.

Contributions to the team of an INTP

In a team environment, the INTP can contribute by:

* using analytical and critical skills to solve problems
* focusing attention on the central issue
* providing intellectual insight
* suggesting ideas that achieve long and short term aims
* viewing information objectively

The potential ways in which an INTP can irritate others include:

* being too intellectual
* finding too many flaws, and not accepting imperfect but ‘good enough’ solutions
* not taking account of others’ feelings
* leave others to worry about implementation once the major problems have been solved
* clinging to a principle at the expense of relationships and harmony

Yeah, well. Scarifyingly dead-on, I must say.

In the past year or so I have gone on many, many, many business trips. Oh, to think that there was a time when I thought that business travel was probably Glamorous and Exciting and You Get To See Lots of Cool Places on the Company Dime!!

Well, it ain’t, it ain’t and you don’t.

There are two kinds of business travel. There’s the kind where you are going to a conference or a seminar or a training course as a recipient of knowledge only, which is actually a blast. This is because all that is required of you is to show up someplace for roughly the normal equivalent of a typical work day, absorb whatever you are there to absorb during that time frame, then party like a beast into the wee hours. I had a trip like that to Montreal early last year. I actually didn’t anticipate it being as fun as it was–I knew I’d have plenty of time to explore the city ’cause it was a four-day seminar from 8 am to 4 pm each day, but I was the only person not just from my job site, but from my entire company attending, and a quick check of the folks I know from surrounding companies didn’t reveal anybody else from them that I might know enough to pal around with either. However, by the end of the first day I had fallen in with a group of folks in my general age range from various other companies and, heh. Montreal is a fun city…the first night we went out, we were out til 11 pm and I was kinda tired the next day and so was everyone else and we swore we wouldn’t do THAT again…so of course the next night we stayed out til 1 am and we REALLY swore, ya know, tomorrow night is the last night before the final day of the seminar so we will be good TOMORROW night..!

Yeah, we stayed out til 3 am. Oh well.

However, this kind of trip comprises the definite minority of my business trips. Mostly, I am there to work, and when that is the case, the days are usually at least twelve hours long and even after they are over, you have so much follow-up-and-preparatory work still to do that you have to go straight to your hotel room and spend another three hours on the faithful laptop. So in spite of the fact that I subsequently traveled to Chicago, Indianapolis (okay, we can probably skip over Indianapolis as a potential fun spot anyway–sorry to anyone who lives there, please don’t take offense!), New York, Helsinki, Los Angeles, Stockholm, Quebec City and Philadelphia, I did not really have too much in the way of F-U-N. Read, practically NONE, bleh! My company got its money’s worth outta me, let’s put it that way.

This most recent business trip was of the usual variety. Flew out to LA Wednesday, trapped on the job site during all beautiful beach hours, just flew back in on the last night on the redeye and was a total effed-up mess in the morning. In an (unusual!) good stroke of fortune, our travel agency got confused and put me in an “Economy Plus” seat right behind the First Class section on the return flight instead of the usual crap seat in the dead back of the plane so EVEN THOUGH our plane had unspecified electrical problems that kept us at the departure gate for an hour and a half after we were supposed to take off, it could’ve been way worse.

Anyway, in my bountiful spare time on this plane and many others, I have been compiling a running list of thoughts, advice and complaints that I feel like sharing. Also, it’s a painless way to solicit advice from any other frequent fliers out there that might wanna share some happy tips on making business travel life more like people THINK it is rather than the way it ACTUALLY usually turns out–hook me up!

Long Plane Flights:

1. They suck.

2. Don’t wear socks; your ankles swell up like balloons sitting in a fixed position at high altitude for hours.

3. Do business class or even the new “economy plus” if you possibly can, unless you enjoy seeing how long you can sit with your knees jammed into your chin. Do not ever fly JetBlue. I am five feet eight inches tall and one hundred thirty-five pounds, which makes me a very average size for an American person, and I was physically unable to sit facing forward in their standard seat because my knees would not fit behind the seat in front of me and the seatbelt prongs dug into both sides of my butt.

4. When making transoceanic flights, do not leave the business class TV screen tuned to the picture of the plane going over the ocean. It may seem cool at first, but after you discover that intervals of three hours at a time don’t appear to change the plane’s position over the endless blank blue appreciably you start to lose it a little.

5. Make a big hairy deal to yourself out of trips to the bathroom with the toiletries kit they give you.

6. Accept in advance that there will be a screamy poopy nauseated baby within fifteen feet of you on any flight you are on that lasts more than three hours, especially any flight you plan on sleeping during.

7. There is no law that says you have to talk to large stinky older men sitting next to you, even if they keep trying.

8. Pay absolutely no attention to anything the pilot says, especially about “turbulence” or “mechanical problems.” Seriously, what can you do about it?

9. Accept that if you try to alleviate the paralyzing boredom of the flight by eating everything they offer you in business class, you will gain at least five pounds by the time you return home and you will suffer indigestion on the plane and also, it won’t taste very good.

10. Whatever you do, do not miss your scheduled flight, as any replacement flight will be twice as long, require at least twice as many plane transfers and will have layovers of either less than one hour (especially for international flights) or more than four hours (especially for domestic flights). Also, believe that customs and baggage officials couldn’t care less about the quality of your life personally.

I (heart) blogging. My goal is to not clog it up with any sentences longer than 50 words. I tend toward those, though I would like to also state that they are always correctly punctuated throughout.

Lessee, about me. I am from Kansas, though I’m not there anymore. As a matter of fact, it is not geographically possible for me to reside farther from Kansas than I am right now without leaving the mainland United States. This is a happy, happy thought. Not that I try to hide my roots from a state so infamous for its nonstop attempts to stuff Creationism into its public schools, for having the most openly psychotic US Senator, for its long-standing public campaign to off one of its three whole abortion-providing physicians, for being one of the ten states most commonly forgotten by people who are on a long road trip and trying to pass the time by seeing who can name all 50 state capitals.

Look at that! A 50+ word sentence already. And NOT correctly punctuated throughout…damn semicolons…things are already going downhill.

Stay tuned!

Lisa Kansas